A Guide to Designing News Graphics

Originally published on CollegeHumor, July 21, 2017

Are you starting a news channel? Especially a local news channel? The viewer won’t know to trust you unless you look like all the other crappy news station they hate and distrust. Here’s some design advice that will up your game.

1. Pick a color palette

Just kidding, you already have a color palette: the goddamn American flag. Anything besides red, white and blue would be cowardly and socialist.

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Ah, what diverse range of colors to work within!

Don't forget to include gradients.

2. Add some shapes

You know, something that's evocative yet appropriate for either "Cute Puppy Learns How to Play Candy Crush " or "Brutal Genocide Rids the World of Puppies": Squares. Rectangles. Lines. Circles inside circles.

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 And now…MAKE ‘EM ALL 3-D.

No flat design—never mind that it's the most popular aesthetic trend of this decade. You need shapes with DIMENSIONS because you're presenting the REAL news FROM ALL SIDES.

Also, add some gradients.

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NOW WE'RE TALKING.

3. Add some super snazzy light effects

As long as news graphics are around, the under-appreciated art of laser light shows will live on.

Choose effects that will leave the viewer wondering, "Ooo, where is the shiny light going and can I follow?" Don't worry about having any motion design skills. Any basic video editing software will have these presets available for you.

Also, add more gradients.

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4. Throw a cityscape on there

Does your small-ass city not have much of a skyline? No problem. Take a photo of your biggest, most European-looking building from below to fake some semblance of a skyline.

Also, add some more gradients.

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5. Get really zoom-y with your text

Are you offering a hard-hitting perspective on current news? GOOD. LET'S SEE IT IN YOUR TEXT.

DYNAMIC SLANTS. WOOSH SOUND EFFECTS. BOLD FONTS. The more it looks like an overly dramatic Powerpoint slide, the more journalistic integrity you have.

Make it all glow-y and gradient-y.

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6. Add a globe for funsies

Even if you’re the local news, you need to show how worldly you are for some reason. If you can make the world spin, that's even better because it shows you understand the tiniest bit of science.

Don't forget to add more gradients.

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Congratulations! Now you have created the perfect professional news graphics to uphold the high standards of journalism!

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